It's been a long while since my last blog entry. A lot has happened since. My last week was one of the most challengeing week for me. It started with getting sick in Darjeeling with stomach problems, vomitting, and diaheria. Then when I returned back to Kolkata I caught pink eye. I got medicated for it, with eye drops, ontiment, and antibiodics. I thought that was the last that could of possibly gone bad for me but there was still more instored.... I'll mention it later.
Well, my last week was full of emotions. It was so surreal for me that I was returning back to the states. The States seemed like such a far away place, not only in physical distance but the reality of the States seemed so unbelievable. Everything that I've became so accustomed to in Kolkata was the exact opposite from what the state offered. From how spacious the streets are in thstates to the cleaninest. Looking around Kolkata I couldn't believe we even shared the same world. It seemed as if I was in two different worlds and that I was living two different lives. I felt that while I was in India, I've never lived in the States before... that the states was only something of my imagination and now that I'm home I can't believe there's such a place like Kolkata, India that exists. It's hard for me to grasp and realize it all because how fortunate we are in the States.
Well, I put in full days of work during my last week. From working in the morning with the children in the orphanage and teaching in the schools, to holding music class and teaching the new guitar player who's taking over for me, the songs for Mother Teresa's 10 year memorial, and than I in the afternoon I finished up the wall paintings. All was finished! I couldn't believe everything was coming to an end. On friday (the day before my last day), I was able to visit Shishu Bhavan. A site that only female can volunteer at. Sara started the Nirmala school with 3 others when she was in Kolkata 2 years back, and I asked permission to visit her school and one of her students, Isha. I was granted the privillege to do so and when I visited I was able to sit in the class room and I also had the opportunity to talk to Isha. It was amazing. She was so happy to see me, someone she didn't even know, but she still was so excited. I gave her a present from sara; a journal, crayons, and ring pops! She absolutely adored it and was very proud of her gifts she recieved. When I had to leave Isha was all but willingly to allow so. "No go." She said everytime I told her I need to go. "No go!" It was so adorable, as she held my arm and persisted that I stayed with her, someone I've met only 20 minutes ago. I headed over to daya Dan and continued teaching at the school for my last friday class! It was sad but I knew that the children were going to continue strong with many teachers that will do a better job at teaching than I do. During that same day (friday), The roof top of Daya Dan caught on fire! A stove was running on a hot day underneathe a dry roof... so the combination of heat underneathe and the heat from the sun above caught the roof on fire along with many clothes haning on the roof top. It was pretty dramatic and we had to close off all electricity and hose down the whole roof. It was brought under control but got us all in a scare. Sometime, that afternoon I also got a haircut on the side of the street inbetween sudder and new market. The guy who cut my hair did it all with sisscors and a switch blade... it was pretty impressive.
My last day, fell on the same day as Mother Teresa's birthday. It was so beautiful! I went to morning mass and had my rosary blessed by Mother Teresa at her Tomb. After mass because of the festival and display that was set up in the volunteer's room due to Mother's birthday all the volunteers headed over to Shishu bhavan for breakfast. I was held back at Mother House because Sr. Melrose had asked me to do her a favor before I leave on my last day. While all the volunteers were at Shishu Bhavan, all the MC sisters and Sister Nirmala gathered around Mother teresa's tomb and sang her happy birthday. Luckily, I was able to witness such a beauitful sight on my last day... a gift I believe Mother gave me on her birthday. I also recieved a blessing from Sr. Nirmala and the sacrament of reconcilation by a priest from france before my flight that evening. Well, by the time I got out of Mother House and to Shishu Bahavan for breakfast, they have already finish breakfast and singing goodbye to all the last day volunteers (all the last day volunteers besides me). As sad as that was... I was alright with it. It was God's way to tell me I was doing the service for him and not for praise. That my time spent here was for the children, for the poor and through them for the Christ and not for myself. Once again, the trip was challenging me to incress in my humility.
On my way to Daya dan I stopped by a local market and bought some balloons for the children during my last day. I spent my last morning at Daya Dan practicing guitar with Sr. Johana Fa, Mongol, Megha, and the new guitar player to prepare for mass. Around 9 the childrened and sisters gathered on the second floor and we celebrated mass. My last mass at Daya Dan, and I was able to play guitar for them and share all the joys of seeing my beloved children. After mass I went upstairs and we had a party! I brought out the balloons and gave them to the children and sr Christalata gave out candy! The children were so beautifully dressed for Mother Teresa's birthday, it was so amazing to see them all but it also made me sad thinking it was my last day. The children gathered and sang happy birthday to Mother Teresa than we all hung out all morning and just had fun!
I went downstairs to see all the was going on and when I got downstair Sr. Johana Fa and the boys had bought me a cake and was waiting for me. They gathered around and say to me, "we thank you, uncle.. we love you, uncle... we'll miss you, uncle.... and come back, uncle" It was so beautiful that it almost made me cry! I couldn't bare the thought of leaving them all! I was so sad but I quickly filled my mind with happy thoughts as I cut the cake and gave it to the children and passed out candy!They immediately cheered me up as they fought in line to get candy and cake. It was so wonderful to see them all so happy. I thanked Sr. Johana Fa for all Daya Dan has given me and she did the same. Reminding me the children will always remember me from the painting I left on the walls for them. She gave me the address to Daya Dan so I can write and I spent my last few moments among the children.
Later the evening I was able to return to Mother's Tomb one last time, and than head over to St. Mary's for a special mass dedicated to Mother Teresa's 97th Birthday. Many of the MC sisters were at St. Mary, that it filled more than half the church with MC sisters! It was beautiful. The Bishop was there and gave the homily on Mother's service to the poor. I couldn't have ended my time in Kolkata any better. After celebrating my last mass in Kolkata, I had a few hours before I headed out for the airport. Packing was rushed and I had a lot things to donate, and also a lot to bring home. I took a shower and put on newly bought clean clthoes and headed off into the taxi for the airport. When I arrived it was still 10pm or so, my ticket told me I wasn't going to leave till about 1am and I still haven't had dinner yet so I went up into a resturant and grabbed some Chicken Haka Noddles for dinner. I decided I should check in early just in case... and when I got to my checkin for my luguage... I found out my plane was leaving in 10 minutes or so and I haven't scanned my bags, and checked in my lugguage. At that time they already shut down the xray scan for my baggage and had to reopen it for me. They told me the flight was full, but luckily I already had a seat. Through all the frustration... I made it to my plane with seconds to spare.
When the rush of insanity had stopped, my luggage was checked, my carry-ons were stored away, and I was seated in the airplane, I looked up to realize... this is really happening- I'm headed back to the States. I couldn't believe my eyes. Everything inside the plane to me seemed so luxurious, nice and clean. It was air conditioned, equipped with TV monitors, headphones plugins at every seat, music radio, tv, movies, food service... I was in awe. When we were in air I kept thinking back of Daya Dan. All I can remember thinking was that I wish I could trade my plane ticket so Mongol or Megha can expereince flying an airplane once in their life. Not nessesarily even going to the US but just expereincing being in a airplane. As I sat there and thought about my kids at Daya Dan I could hear Megha's voice in my head... picturing her here with me on the plane, and her telling me "Oh, So nice uncle. So nice!" As she looks around with her beautiful brown eyes and pearly white teeth held with a smile. I imagined Mongol sitting by me, looking out the window as we soared above the clouds. Mongol loves learning about the world, continents, and astronomy... I only then could imagine the smile on his face as he points out the window with wide opened eyes in disbelief, flying above the world. These thoughts flooded my mind and remained with me for the duration of my flight and filled my eyes with tears. I tried to fight them back but I was so sad to leave all the children I grew so fond of. I could only imagine how excited they would be to see all the TVs in the plane, all the meals, snacks, and drinks I recieved on the plane; if only I could share it with the children at Daya Dan. I often mention about Mongol, Megha, Piya, and Bashker but honestly... I've grown close to many of the children at Daya Dan. Those that struggle with speech, with mobility, and with the children that suffer with deformity. I love them all so dearly. It really sadden my heart to think (and also know because Sister told me) that many of the children at Daya Dan don't get adopted. All I can think is WHY NOT?! I love them so much and want them to enjoy the same luxury I freely enjoy each day in the States. I have more than enough. I just wished I was able to bring home one child (if not all) and show the child love of a family and take the child to the park weekly. Have the child go to FREE public school, take them to the movies, the ocean & mountains, ... there's so much the world has to offer. But so few are the numbers of those generous people who want to share their luxury with others.
Believe it or not, the bathroom on the plane was the nicest bathroom I've used in months! Sadily it was the cleaniest also. It was the first time I was able to sit on the toliet seat... and also the first time in a LONG time since I've used toliet paper... haha. Oh, all the things we take for granted and the things we can actually live without. Although my pink eye and tomach problem came more under control, I developed this weird skin irritation. I began to notice it when I was on my first flight back and it's progressed from each flight connection. It's all up my arm, and has spread to my other arm and down my back. I got back in states and the day after I came home I went to the doctor to get checked up and get my blood test. The doctor told me it looks like Lyme skin disease, so I'm hooked up on Antibiodics for another 15 days and I've lost 15 lbs since I left .
God truly is allowing me to share in suffering and I truly felt as if God had given me the perfect traveling experience along with so many graces during my journey. The last week in India he hasked of me to share in suffering with all those that I served; those that are weak and skinny without food, with the paitents that were sick and needed care, with the yearning thirst for love and home that many people live without. This last week God has asked me to lift up a part of my burden with the burdens of my suffering fellowmen, throughout th various homes and sites and with those that go without food, clothes, or shelter on the streets of Kolkata.
I'm back in the states now... sitting at home with SOOO much space! Given my house at home I've always complained about being so small. A one story 4 room house with 8 people under the roof was everything but living large but coming back from Kolkata... I now realized how blessed I am. I can open up a frig and find food while those that live on the streets in India work each day in hopes that they'll have something to provide for their family that evening. I can come home bathe and feel clean... open up my closet to a closet full of clothes and pick out what i'm going to wear for the day, while many of those in India where the same outfit for the year... if not longer. It's been so weird being back in states. I honestly can't believe how much space we have here, how much food we have and waste, how clean it is, and how big everything is... the house, the yard, the roads, cars, meals, ... EVERTYHING!
Through all the joy, saddness, hardship, frustration, sickness, and love I expereinced while I was in Kolkata, God was there beside me. I placed all my trust in Him at the beginning of my trip that he would provide the means for me to serve Him in Kolkata India and He did just so, and I trusted that God would take care of me while I was there and he hasn't abondoned me yet. He is my true love and my life's journey that I've traveled the world to find. This summer is a summer I will never forget. Already I've begin to see the impact it has made in me. Life's too short, live it and live it with great love. For it we do not work for peace in our jobs, our families, friends, among nations and religion, then our lives will be empty of love. For where there's peace there is love, and where there's love we shall find God. For God is love, so let us set our lives in service of love. So we can become a prophet of Love; a prophet of God.
Blessed Mother Teresa of Kolkata, you've set the path before us all to show us how to live selflessly and with great love. Continue to guide us for you've gone before us and now dwell in the Kingdom of your true love, Our Lord. Teach us how to serve, to be humble, to give, and to love to those around us, especially to find Jesus in Disguise. May we strive to make our life mission a mission of love to all we come in contact with.
Happy 10 year memorial Mother Teresa.
